In 2 days, you’ll be gone. Not forever, sure. But the work that will probably come to define you is on it’s way out. And myself, along with all the other kool kids, have quite a few feelings about that.
Rest assured: We know you’re doing the right thing. We trust you. You’ve done right by us for 5 incredible seasons. That said, we have invested a lot of time in this series. Meaning the end has got to be totally satisfying. And it’s in that spirit that I must make a few requests.
1. Let’s cut to the chase. We all know you’re gonna kill Walt. The whole show was founded on the premise that he would inevitably die in the end. And it’s not going to be peaceful either. The last episode sends this message, loud and clear. It’s just a matter of how.
But here’s what he needs to do: get his money to his family. All of it. If not, you’ve gotta make it up to us (ie. give him the most dramatic demise ever – with tears and blood and a shit-ton of gunfire). Oh, and a bullet-hole through the tattoo on Jack’s neck would be greatly appreciated.
2. No more Marie. She’s served us well over the years as a comic side character. But unless she shoots Walt personally, she has no more purpose in this story arc. And if she does – somehow – end up being Walt’s killer, I will unwatch every episode of the series, unwrite all of my glowing reviews, and start using meth just to contradict your moral indictment of the drug trade.
3. Give us one more breakfast with Junior. For old time’s sake.
4. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let Jesse live. He can finally head out to Alaska or New Zealand or wherever the hell he wants and start anew. The poor kid needs a break. And I want to believe there’s enough good in his heart that he might be ok.
I know he’s made mistakes. Over. And over. And over again. BUT, I think if he really started from square one, he could fix good (get it? it’s a play on break bad! me so clever). We all know he just got caught up with the wrong crowd. Plus, in another life, he would be a great dad.
I know you’re not one for storybook endings. While it would be great for Jesse to see Brock one last time, I don’t expect it. But let’s be real here – You gave that sonuvabitch Hank a moment, it’s only fair that Jesse have his. SOMETHING. Just give us this one shining beacon of hope you sadistic jerk! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!
5. If Jesse doesn’t pan out, there’s always Skyler. Right now, her future is bleak. Even if Walt manages to give her the money – which he BETTER, so help me Gilligan! – it’s not gonna fix her thousand other problems. We are an insecure folk, us devoted followers. We need to know that there’s something about Walt’s downfall that makes it all worth it.
The rollercoaster ride that is Breaking Bad has been like really crazy sex. It had all the suspense, anticipation, fun surprises, and foreplay that makes that shit so fun. Now we just need that satisfying climax. Sure, there will be tears. But as long as we don’t have collective blue balls, it’ll be ok. Don’t be that guy, Vince. Finish what you start. And for Pete’s sake, make it mind-blowing.
I’m being considerate here. Seriously. I’m giving you a whole 2 days to go back and re-film or edit based on these demands– er, suggestions. And we all know how tremendously easy it is to round a team together and make movie stuff. Just look at Joss Whedon – he filmed an entire MOVIE in 2 weeks. What’s a few scenes here-and-there?
So that’s that. The rest is in your hands. No matter what happens, I am so in. This series has totally raised the bar. You’ve given us some great entertainment, and you’ve done it in such a bold way. As a fan of dramatic storytelling, I love you for it.
And just ask the internetz. I’m not alone in that.
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